Rhyme, Reason, and the Southern Accent
January 17, 2013 § 1 Comment
(This is FOR REAL, based on a true story from my former school.)
Rainy days demand a lot of teacher ingenuity to keep students focused on the lesson at hand, so a first grade teacher (we’ll call her Mrs. Smith) decided to play a game. She carefully reviewed the way we rhyme words, divided the class into two teams, and began the challenge.
“Who can give me a word that rhymes with ‘cat’?” She asked.
“Bat!” shouted a little girl in the front row.
“Yes! Team Green takes the lead if you can use that word correctly in a sentence,” she replied.
“I hit a home run with the bat,” the little girl said.
“Absolutely correct, Team Green. Now who can give me a word that rhymes with ‘frog’?”
“Log!” cried a young man sitting by the window. “The snake crawled under the log.”
“Wonderful! That makes two points for Team Green.”
And so the game continued, with Team Green soaring to a four point lead.
“Okay, now here’s a tough one…this one is worth FIVE POINTS! It could win the game. Think carefully. Who can give me a word that rhymes with ‘corn’?
After a brief silence, one little boy from Team Red frantically waved his hand. “I know! I know!”
“It’s worth five points, Davey. Team Red could pull to the lead if your word rhymes with ‘corn’ and you use the word correctly in a sentence.”
“Yes, m’am.” Davey straightened himself in his desk, cleared his throat, and confidently replied, “Porn.”
Mrs. Smith was understandably quite shocked that her first grader would have even heard the word ‘porn,’ but before she could think how to respond, Davey proudly said his sentence: “It’s porn rain outside, today.”
(Only in the South!)